A Cthulhu Hymnal

The Solstice Song

``I have an exceedingly rare copy of the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society's Solstice Carol Songbook. This odd volume contains fourteen of your favorite Christmas tunes with new and improved non-euclidean, Lovecraftian lyrics.... Many more available upon request.'' --- Branney.

Victims roasting on an open fire,
Deep Ones ripping off your nose,
Mindless chanting 'round the funeral pyre
And folks strung up by their toes.
Ev'rybody knows how festive open wounds can be;
You'll go crazy at the sight.
Tiny tots with their eyeballs aglow
Will find it hard to sleep tonight.
They know Cthulhu's on his way;
The beast is rising from the depths of dark R'lyeh.
And ev'ry mother's child is gonna cry
And beg for mercy and pray quickly to die.
And so I'm offering this simple phrase
To kids from one to ninety two;
Although its been said many times, many ways,
``Barra na zu absu.''

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